First Actual Poetry Post

 I'm going to share with you the first two poems I wrote in Neil Hilborn's writing circle on 9/9/20.

The warmup prompt was to start a poem with the line, "Nothing ever absolutely has to happen".

Sometimes all it takes is a feeling
An urge, a desire to make a change.
That soul snatching, empty helplessness
to just get out of bed in the morning.
That moment your inner voice finally erupts and shouts,
"ENOUGH!"

The main prompt was to write a good old "Fuck You" poem to someone.

Listen here you Texan fuck -
You can put on your "Good Ole Boy" act in front of my family and friends
Make them think you treat me like a queen,
But your list says otherwise -
Yeah, that list you made and then read to me detailing all the ways I wasn't good enough;
Not lady-like enough, I cussed too much, I never wore dresses or skirts,
But my favorite was how much you hated that I walked around with chipped nail polish!
You should know this;
I've changed none of those things about me.
What would I change about you though?
I'd erase your strident voice and over the top drawl,
Your feigned "Holier than thou" attitude would be weighed down with cinder blocks
And dropped into the deepest body of water, never able to emerge.
Most importantly, I'd change you into a woman
So you could see first hand the shit we put up with from guys like you.
Then, I'd change you back and maybe, just maybe
You'd become a decent person for the first time in your pathetic life.

February Vacation?

 Here again, here again.

This past week has been February vacation for school, so I've had the week off from work. My plan for the week was to move back into my condo; apparently that was not meant to be though. Management called to tell me that my downstairs neighbor had a leak in their ceiling, so could I please check all my appliances. Well, my fridge was leaking and clearly had been for some time. The floors are laminate hardwood and it turns out the "subfloor" was actually thick insulation meant to go in walls. My floors soaked up all the water until it couldn't hold anymore and then leaked downstairs. There was never a puddle or any indication of water whatsoever. 
This resulted in having to rip up all of the flooring in my kitchen, remove all cabinets and appliances, and take some drywall down because there was mold. My next step is to get some contractors in to get quotes for how much it will be to put new floors down and put my kitchen back together. To say that this week has been exhausting would be a major understatement!

Here are some before and after pictures (the drywall was not yet taken down in the after pictures):

And since my condo was built 15 years ago and all of the material was builder grade, the adjustor doubts very much that we'll be able to find flooring to match what's already there. So who knows what the end result will even be!

So yeah, I'm annoyed as well as physically and mentally exhausted. I'm also even more stressed than usual!

Cheers! 😫

A Rambling Return to Blogging

 It's been almost three years since I wrote my first blog post on here. In that time I've written a whopping five more posts! To be perfectly honest, I kind of forgot about this thing. I'm back now, writing under a new blog name, and A LOT has changed since my first post in 2018. 

WARNING: This post is going to contain a good bit of rambling!

My reason for returning is the same as why I originally started this thing; a distraction from my AP.
Feel free to go back to my older posts and read up on the hell that is AP and why, after my shower, I need the distraction.

This blog was originally entitled The Itchy Nanny; the itchiness having to do with my AP, and at that time, I was a nanny. The itchy part remains true, but I'm no longer a nanny. 
In the summer of 2018, at the age of 30 I realized that my beloved nanny girls were getting older and would no longer need me. So it was time for a job with benefits that would allow me to save for the future and retirement, and all that fun adult stuff. I began my current career working in a program in an elementary school with students with social, emotional, and behavioral needs. 

I'm now in my third year doing this and the first two years, I loved (almost) every day of work. I still love the program, my students and coworkers, but COVID-19 has really fucked things up!
My students are considered high needs, so they've been in person four days a week since September, with Wednesday as a remote learning day for all students. I'll sum this school year up so far by simply saying that it's been a complete shit show!

Now, onto one of the greatest things that's happened since I've been away.
I found and became a part of the most amazing poetry writing communities ever created; Neil Hilborn's Writing Circle! (If you don't know who Neil Hilborn is, I feel sorry for you, but for the love of everything go look him up and watch his poetry performances!!!!) Going into it I was thinking it would be a fun way to improve my poetry and learn from Neil. While that was true, it has also been so much more. Neil has created a family of poets, and while I may not have met any of them in person yet (thanks, COVID) if any of them needed anything, I would be there in a heartbeat. Every week writing circle is scheduled for two hours, but always lasts much longer. There are crazy conversations, uncontrollable laughter, tears, and a genuine feeling of being loved and accepted just the way you are. And isn't that what we all want and need?
I've grown tremendously with my poetry (in my personal opinion). And soon, two of my poems will be published in an Anthology that Neil has put together. It will only be $3 but all proceeds will go towards To Write Love On Her Arms. 

Okay, I think that's enough rambling for now. I'm going to try to keep up with this thing and probably focus it more on poetry! 💜💜💜